


We Can't Be Together

by orphan_account



Category: Shingeki no Kyojin | Attack on Titan
Genre: Angst, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Fluff, Kissing, Love Confessions, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-04-10
Updated: 2018-04-10
Packaged: 2019-04-20 22:34:01
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,501
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14270961
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account
Summary: “You know that I love you, Eren..” Levi whispered, squeezing the boy in his arms with a forceful hug, though it only made him cry harder.He knew exactly what the captain was to say, and he was not prepared to hear it in the slightest.“But, we can’t be together.”





	We Can't Be Together

“Eren..” Levi murmured as his hand knocked gently against the boy’s door, making sure to keep his voice low, as to not wake anybody. It was late, and the day had been long. After hours upon hours of training and barely any time to rest, the both of them had been completely and utterly worn out. It didn’t help that Eren had been sitting timidly beside Levi’s desk when he arrived back to his quarters, claiming he needed to confess something. And that, he did. It was entirely unexpected and entirely inappropriate considering their situation, though Eren had confessed his love for Levi.

 

After a long moment of silence, Eren decided he didn’t need to wait for an answer. He already knew the rejection that was to come if he were to stay any longer, and so he rushed away before Levi could even say a word, tears already streaming down his face in a way that he knew would make him look idiotic if anyone were to see him.

 

And now the both of them were here, the large wooden door between them was the only thing separating them, and Levi’s heart ached in his chest as he heard the soft sobs from the other side. “Eren, please let me in..” the captain raised his voice a little, not so loud as to startle the boy, but just to make himself heard. There were a few quiet sounds, presumedly the boy shifting his position before the door was slowly opened, allowing Levi to enter.

 

“Eren..” Levi repeated the boy’s name once again as he crouched down, kneeling beside the boy who had situated himself on the floor, hand covering his mouth to muffle his cries. The captain’s hand reached out automatically, brushing away the tears that streamed down Eren’s cheeks like a waterfall, making his eyes look glassy and oh so beautiful, that it hurt to look at them for too long. Eren squeezed his eyes shut at the feeling of Levi’s skin against his own. The warmth and gentle touch of his fingers caused a loud sob to leave the boy’s mouth. 

 

Levi frowned, pulling the boy’s head towards his chest gently, allowing him to cry into the fabric of his shirt. “Don’t cry,” he whispered, pressing his face into the boy’s hair, sighing gently. He watched as Eren tried to calm down his breathing, rubbing his hand against the boy’s arm in a weak attempt to relax him, though it seemed to be working well enough.

 

“I-I’m sorry, Captain,” Eren stuttered out through sniffles and hiccups, face pressed tightly against Levi’s chest, trying his very best to hide his tear-stained face. “I don’t k-know what I was thinking..” It was painful to listen to how wrecked Eren’s voice was, but Levi listened all the same, stroking his hair gently, trying his very best to calm the boy, despite his lack of experience with situations such as these.

 

“You know that I love you, Eren..” Levi whispered, squeezing the boy in his arms with a forceful hug, one that made Eren feel forever safe, made his stomach warm with emotions, though it only made him cry harder. He knew exactly what the captain was to say, and he was not prepared to hear it in the slightest. 

 

“But, we can’t be together.” the captain  finished, pulling Eren’s head from his chest to look at his face.

 

The words stung like a knife to the chest. Like Levi had personally penetrated his heart with sharp steel. It caused more fresh, salty tears to roll down the boy’s cheeks, his chest heaving and his entire body wracked with sobs. He pushed at Levi’s chest, trying to back away from him and calm his breathing, though Levi’s arms only tightened around the sobbing boy.

 

“Shh..” He tried to calm Eren down gently, cradling his head in his arms as he pressed it back against his chest, “Don’t push me away,” he meant it literally and figuratively, “I don’t want you to hate me because of this.. I’m just doing what’s best for the both of us,” Levi whispered, stroking the soft brown locks atop of Eren’s head, feelings the boy’s tears stain his shirt, though he didn’t really care all that much.

 

Eren was trying his very best to get his words out, though most of them came out in a jumbled mess. “I should n-never have told you, should’ve just k-kept my feelings in. I’m a fu-fucking idiot, thinking that I c-could ever be with y-you, you’re too perfec-” The boy’s mumbled words were cut off as Levi pulled his head back, tugging at his hair, a stern look upon his captain’s face.

 

“Don’t you dare call me perfect,” Levi spoke angrily, though he tried his best to keep his cool, as to not startle Eren. He could hear the edge in his own voice, escaping along with his composure. “I’m so fucking far from perfect.” Eren’s mouth hung open at the captain’s sudden outburst, hands shaking, hair still pulled back tight in Levi’s firm grip.

 

Eren’s eyes scanned Levi’s features carefully, noticing the other’s lip tremble, though he could tell that the captain was trying to hold back, watching him squeeze his eyes shut angrily. “Do you know how many people I’ve lost, Eren? How many friends I’ve selfishly let the lives of be taken?..” The man’s words were sudden, though they lacked the venom his earlier sentences had seeped. The younger stayed silent, his eyes wide, almost frightened.

 

When Levi saw the look on the younger boy’s face, the tears he had been holding back so well finally fell from his eyes, rolling slowly down his cheeks. “I lost Isabel, I lost Farlan, I lost Petra..” the older choked on his words, letting out a gentle sob, “All because I was so fucking selfish..” Eren opened his mouth to speak, reaching up a shaky hand to press against the captain’s cheek, making the older man flinch away.

 

“Eren, Please listen to me.. I can’t get attached to you.. If I do, I-” A soft cry, fresh tears, “I’m just going to lose you like I did them,” Levi’s words left Eren speechless. All he could do was stare, watching the few tears that managed to escape his dark, tired eyes. His heart ached for Levi. Ached to hold him, to kiss him, to dry his cheeks, but he just sat, unable to form a comprehensible sentence.

 

The captain pressed his palms into his eyes, sighing softly as he calmed his breathing, feeling Eren’s eyes bore into him from behind his hands. “I.. I apologise,” Levi breathed out, squeezing his eyes shut one last time before removing his hands from his face in favour of placing them atop of Eren’s.

 

“C-Captain..” Eren’s voice was hoarse and quiet from crying. He laced his fingers with Levi’s. “You aren’t going to lose me..” he whispered, feeling Levi squeeze his hands gently, bringing both of them to his face, the warm skin bringing him comfort. He couldn’t remember the last time he had cried so hard. Even after his entire squad had perished, he had only shed a few small tears. The pain of bottling everything inside for so long was taking a toll on him.

 

“I love you, Captain.”

 

The words made Levi’s lips curl upwards a little. “Eren.. Promise me.. Promise me that I won’t lose you,” He demanded, desperate for some kind of reassurance, for some kind of comfort. Eren surged forwards in a moment of confidence, hands cupping Levi’s jaw tightly, the older man letting out a soft noise of surprise. 

 

“You will  _ never  _ lose me,” Eren murmured as he pressed his mouth against Levi’s in a gentle kiss, one that made Levi want to sob his heart out all over again because, it was finally happening, he finally had his lips on the boy he had fallen for all those months back in the courthouse. His mind was hazy as he slowly pressed back against Eren, lips moving in slow, deep kisses that made his stomach leap happily.

 

The amount of times he had tried to push his feelings away, the sleepless nights he spent with Eren on his mind, the endless days of longing and pining, none of it mattered anymore. He didn’t fucking care anymore. He wanted Eren and Eren alone. As the two finally parted, Levi took in a long breath, opening his eyes that had been squeezed shut in favour of meeting Eren’s turquoise ones. They looked so gentle. So welcoming and so loving that Levi couldn’t help but smile a little. “I know you’re scared..” Eren whispered, “But you can trust me when I say I will never leave you, Levi. Not if I can help it.”

 

In that moment, as the two shared another gentle kiss, Levi finally believed that he had found somebody who he would never let go of, no matter how many people would try to take him away.


End file.
